It is not necessary to experience any setbacks to feel despair. Humans often unprovoked come up with a sense of despair. No matter how much enviable and praiseful things are on the outside, you will feel at some point that life is grey, bleak, empty and panic just like ants eroding the bones of your body.
You’ll feel that everything you have is useless, that no matter how hard you try, you have nothing.
You will feel that happiness belongs to someone else, you are the world’s most unfortunate people, the world’s loneliest, the most failed, the most helpless, the most inferior people. Then you feel like you don’t only have less, but you have less hope. Stare at some irreversible and unalterable factors, such as blaming yourself for not working hard enough, feel that you are not good enough, or even panic time flying, you are gradually aging, life has passed half or a third, nothing changed, everything still remains the same.
When you feel like you have nothing, there are two changes in your heart that you don’t know:
Bad to the extreme.
Your own wealth, appearance, ability, health, relationships and so on are all invisible, you will only see your bad or things that you are not good enough, can’t see anything that is good in you. Even if rationally you know that you have a lot good, but that feeling is still saying: “that is nothing.” As if life is finished, it is not worth living, not worthy of staying alive.
If you “taste” your own despair carefully at that time, you will feel that in the bottom of your heart, has a stream of voice:
It would be nice if I can lay down like this and never get up again.
It would be if I didn’t try hard and give up myself.
This state of mind is called depression, the concentration of large will lead to some physiological changes, will be diagnosed as a depressive disorder.
The reason why people fall into this state of depression is a kind of protection mechanism of the human subconscious.
When you’re depressed, you’ll feel less interested and less likely to do anything.
This is a low-consumption running state that avoids doing more to squeeze yourself out.
Concentration reduced less attention to the outside world and the beginning of seeing your own experiences. Through depression, you will see yourself who has been neglected.
That’s what depression is all about, to focus on yourself through physiological responses.
People may be depressed because:
The demands on oneself are too much, too much beyond their own strength.
For example, always overestimate self ability, always feel that they can do a lot more, and when they can’t do it, they will blame themselves. They will also use to identify the external standards, think that people should work hard, progressive, responsible . . .
In order to achieve these standards, we constantly force ourselves to do things we don’t like in order to gain a sense of social identity.
Responsibility itself is a good thing, but when the responsibility exceeds self-care, beyond their ability, when the responsibility is greater than their own feelings, will overdraft themselves, the body will automatically enter the state of protection, slowly becomes depression.
So depression is to remind yourself that your own requirements are too high. Even if these requirements may seem normal, you are already reached 80% of your capacity.
When people are depressed, they are actually more demanding than they are.
Do too many insincere things.
If you do too much of what you don’t like, but to do it with the name of to survive, responsibility, right, everyone, then you will be farther away from your own hearts. You will not be able to be yourself, can’t live the true you.
At this time, your subconscious will not feel that you are alive, more like a social standard puppet and machine. People need to enter the depressed state indifferent to the outside world to remind themselves: “Other than making money and responsibility, the attention to your own real needs and feelings.” Depression forces oneself to stay out of the way in these uninteresting things and focus on your heart.
So depression is saying: You should stop.