Reality, is the fact that can’t be changed, that is, what has already happened.
Because there is unsatisfaction in reality, so many people do not want to face reality or not dare to face the reality. They want to escape or avoid ways by deceiving themselves, think that not admitting mistakes or problems, even prevent that the things did not happen.
But what happens has already happened, it is the fact that it cannot be changed, and it is not helpful if you refuse to admit it. What’s more, if you are blindly afraid to face reality, you will let yourself live in pain, because memories will erode your lives.
In this sense, we can only face up to reality so that we will not be eroded by memories.
The girl who lost her love has been afraid to face the reality, so she always lives in the past good memories, down want to walk out, can’t start a new life. She can only live in the memories, erode her life by her memories.
Broken heart is unacceptable to this girl.
Maybe she loved her ex-boyfriend very much, put in all her efforts for this relationship, thought that they can get old together, but when it is over, not able to accept such a reality; However, no matter how bad you don’t want to accept, the fact is that the break-up has happened.
Well, for this girl, she has been afraid to face this reality, and unable to start a new life. In other words, if she had always felt that the lost relationship was the best and she would not have it again, she would have lived in her memories and could not help herself. And such ideas and practices are not conducive to her future life.
Therefore, such a girl will live in painful memories because of love.
Of course, this is not to say that we should be happy and act as nothing happened unless this relationship is not wanted, otherwise, sadness is normal. It just seems to me that if you’re living in memories all the time, that’s the problem. Because if we keep worrying about something, another thing is hard to come into us.
From this point of view, only by daring to face up to reality can we not be eroded by memories.
Face the reality, we will see this relationship, why two people will break up, make a good analysis, find our own shortcomings in order to not make the same mistake in the next relationship, that is the right approach and attitude.
Knowing ourselves is what we’ve been doing, especially in the middle of mistakes and loss, and analyzing ourselves so that it’s good for our growth and mental maturity, but many people don’t want to do it. Because to a certain extent, recognizing yourself includes a lot of self-denial and self-doubt, which is anti-human nature to the nature of narcissism.
Everyone is narcissistic, doesn’t want to admit their own fault, this is also the practice of many people, but people are bound to make mistakes, this is the result of imperfect people. Human is imperfect and it is the truth.
Know yourself, accept your imperfection, is also not to let yourself live in the painful memory.
Like those with cancer, they will remorse and a sense of inferiority, because they feel that they are the burden of family members, their physical health is also the source of their own inferiority, and this idea and feeling, only by daring to face up to the reality, so that they will not be eroded by memories.
Because of serious illness, they are willing to remember their healthy state and even think that they are worthless, life is meaningless, in fact, this is a practice of not accepting the reality, dare not face the reality.
However, if these patients want to walk out of painful memories and believe that they can get healthy again, all they need is to recognize the status quo and dare to face it.
For their own unwillingness to face the reality, if we want to walk out of it, what we can do is dare to face reality, so as not to be eroded by memories.
To say that not to be eroded by memories, in fact, we do not want to leave the comfort zone or do not want to face pain, just think of those good old times to paralyze themselves, the result is to be trapped in the inexorable.
If we are to get out of our pain and start a new life, all we have to do is dare to face reality.
Dare to face the reality, we need to learn to accept.
To face the reality squarely is to accept, to accept yourself and to accept the world.
Like the above-mentioned heartbroken girl, she only accepts the lost love, accepts her own imperfect, not cling to this relationship. Because nothing is absolute, everything changes. Imperiousness is constant.
Dare to face the reality, we need courage.
Accepting reality is not easy because it is not something that anyone can do. Because it takes courage to face the reality. Like the patients with cancer, it takes courage to dare to face the reality. Because such a blow is enough to destroy the hopes of a person, even a family.
When we have the courage to face up to it, it shows that we have a certain psychological preparation for the ultimate anxiety of life- death anxiety. In other words, those who dare to face cancer are actually brave to face death.
Dare to face the reality, we need to take action.
This action is the best tool for freeing us from painful memories. Because life will change substantially only if it is really acted upon. For example, a broken heart girl needs to fall in love again to come out of her painful memory, so that she will not be eroded by her own life, and will have a new relationship;
In fact, this action is the best choice for us not to be eroded by memories.
Life is full of uncertainty, but also there will be pain and sorrow, only dare to face the reality, we will not be eroded by memories, because we will face up to mistakes or problems, rational analysis, and then thoroughly understand, this is the real love of ourselves and love the performance of life.
Only if a person dares to face up to reality, face up to mistakes, and use rational analysis, thoroughly, so that he or she does not be eroded by memories.