Afraid & nervous? This method might help you.

When you’re nervous, will you tell yourself not to be nervous?

In college time, one of the things I hate was doing a presentation, but doing a presentation is inevitable. 

In order to perform a little better, the night before the presentation, I will repeatedly modify PPT, manuscript, change again and again, until too tired in the early morning then only rest.

I thought I am ready, I will not nervous, but it does not seem to be, there are around 100 people, walking into the classroom, I began to be nervous and my heart beat faster and faster, can’t concentrate on the presentation people before me, just think about what should I do and keep telling myself not to be nervous, but it always backfired.

Standing on the podium, I was still shaking with nervousness, my legs numb and I was sweating.

When the lecturer told me because the people before me take up too much time, I need to shorten my presentation, suddenly my brain turned blank, can’t think straight, don’t know what to do, just stand there, good thing is that I’m not doing this alone, but this experience really leave me a deep impression.

Getting nervous is something I have since I was young, small to talk to strangers, big to be giving a speech on stage can make me nervous. Once nervous, I will stutter, sweat easily, speechless, can’t think straight. I have always treated this as abnormal behavior and always reject it. When I get nervous, I will try to hints myself not to be nervous, but it never a success, because I am afraid of nervousness will make myself more nervous, for this reason, I also define myself as an introvert, shy, etc. And then I came in contact with psychology, only to find that it is only my own cognitive deficiencies that cause this wrong definition.

Human fear stems from the unknown, and I resist nervousness because I do not know why people are nervous, why we act like this when we are nervous, and when you understand the nature of the fear, you will find that the most effective way is not to resist it, but to accept it and allow it to exist.

Why do people get nervous?

According to an official statement, human nervousness comes from environmental uncertainty, own uncertainty, and content uncertainty, these three may exist at the same time or only one or two. But in essence, it is a fear of the unknown.

Take myself as an example, I have some kind of expectation toward myself, I hope to perform well, but in reality, it will not be as perfect as I imagine, there are many unknown factors, and I do not have the confidence to deal with those unknown factors, so I will feel nervous and afraid.

Just like during the presentation, at first, I wanted to do according to the pace I imagined, although I am nervous, I still can follow based on how I planned, but once the lecturer interrupted me, I was overwhelmed, because my attention is only focused on keeping myself not nervous, but this situation making things uncontrollable.

When facing an unfamiliar environment, unfamiliar content, unfamiliar situations, people’s nervousness is born.

Why does the heart beat faster when you’re nervous?

The most common behavior when the heart beats faster is nervous, but I always feel that this is not normal, this is a bad reaction, and therefore trying to resist it, but didn’t realize that this is a very normal reaction.

When some people nervous, their hearts beat faster, sweating, and trembling. The heart is controlled by two kinds of nerves, respectively, the vagus nerve and sympathetic nerve;

The vagus nerve slows down the heartbeat, the sympathetic nerve makes the heartbeat faster, When you are nervous, the cerebral cortex will issue instructions to the heartbeat center, stimulate the release of the sympathetic nerve, thus promoting the release of epinephrine hormones, so that the heart beats faster so that the blood supply of the heart increases, supply more blood throughout the body to deal with the crisis.

So when you’re nervous, adrenaline is produced, and adrenaline is created to keep your body on alert and focus on the crisis. If your physical preparation is just right, you’ll think faster and speak more fluidly, and it will be more entertaining than you normally say.

So, moderate nervous actually makes you perform better.

What is moderate nervous and excessive nervous?

Excessive nervous is when you are nervous and you start to reject it because you are nervous, and because you are more nervous, you develop into excessive nervous.

Moderate nervous is when you find yourself nervous, you realize that your body is on alert, you adjust your breathing to allow nervousness to exist, let the brain get into a state of alert, so that become more focused, because your permission to let nervous become a normal existence, you will not waste energy to deal with a normal phenomenon.

When you allow nervous, nervous is a comrade rather than an enemy, so don’t be nervous, allow yourself to be nervous, because it helps you, not hinder you, it is a friend, not an enemy.